I have effectively finished my studies. I do not have to study for exams, do homework, other assignments, prepare presentations or write papers anymore. I handed in my final thesis last Friday. I still need to go to University until the end of classes though.
This is where I feel like I'm in between two places. We do not have a official graduation ceremony. We go to class, hand in that thesis, write a couple of exams and then go our homes of 3 years to find someone to live there next semester. You get your certificate unceremoniously mailed by post.
I have finished studies, but I can't move on with my life. Even when I move away from here I will stay with my parents until I have found a job. Another place in between.
But now to the place I am in between, artistically speaking. John Howe (
www.john-howe.com) put it into words on his forum:
This rather silly cliché of the "agony of the blank canvas/sheet" is simply expecting to do something without any preparation at all. It is overestimating and underestimating yourself, both expecting too much and selling yourself short and confusing to some degree inspiration, information and execution.
On the other hand, the nagging sentiment that [another forum member] mentions, that of having better things one should be doing, and fretting vaguely about time passed but not well spent, is, I believe, endemic to the profession, whether it be what you make your living off or not. It's a permanent state of mind when the things you do artistically depend on you and you alone. When you are creative in a group environment, it is very different.
I have to get my room ready for the prospective flatmates who will be looking at it this afternoon and I will take this as an opportunity to not only tidy up more than ever but also create a good creative atmosphere to draw and paint in. With only 12 m², things tend to clutter up rather rapidly.
My mum has commissioned me to do another wedding card for someone she knows so I hope this will kick my artistic self in the butt.
PS: I would love to use the "
Keep Dreaming" Journal skin because it's got a tree and 'the other side', but I need a sub for that...
PSS:
Inkiiiiiiiiiiiii! 
How cool is that, you gave me a dA sub for the three months that I will be 100% unemployed with a LOT of time at my hands! I will make your generosity known to the world :-D And I can use that journal skin that I liked so much! Weheeee how can I thank you back!?
Thanks so much again!
Mon